Speechwriter Position
Position Summary
The Speechwriter will work with the Communications Department to complete products in a timely manner, often with competing deadlines, and a caucus in a state of perpetual civil war. This involves working with multiple departments, and multiple hidden agendas, to gather the necessary information and incorporating the feedback given by the Director of Communications and the Principal Secretary, as well as Mike Harris and the Ontario Landowners’ Association.

Major duties and responsibilities

• Write Speeches, Columns, News Releases, and falsify your party’s record, and other products as needed
• Try and work cooperatively with all departments towards the completion of projects, but end up infighting about just about everything
• Attend and contribute to interdepartmental meetings with respect to communications products, and always work to ensure that health care, education and human rights are gutted
• Provide creative support on the Leader’s materials to our audio, video and graphics team, and make stuff up as much as possible
  
• Pretend to listen to Rocco Rossi – who, as we all know, got less mayoralty support than Enza the Supermodel

Education & Experience

• University degree, or (ideally) OLA membership
• 3-5 years of previous communication experience, or the complete absence of a soul
  

Skills

• Strong, concise written communications skills are somewhat desirable, but not a prerequisite (cf. our caucus)
• High attention to detail, such as when expensing the leader’s Chicken McNuggets
• Firm understanding of current issues and organizational values, which are: cut, slash, and burn
• Ability to work under pressure while listening to senior leader’s staff scream at each other.  Again.
• Ability to work long hours in the service of Big Tobacco and Multinational Pharmacies
• Exceptional multi-tasking skills and ability to prioritize workload, because firing nurses and closing hospitals is a lot of work, you know
• Ability to use tact, judgment and discretion – qualities that are notably absent within the Ontario PC team (cf. our caucus, Leader)
  
• Willingness to screw over PC stalwarts like Norm Stirling, because that was a condition of the dirty deal Tim Hudak did with Randy Hillier

Details
Nature of position: Full time with benefits, until you are flushed by someone close to the Leader, that is, which is highly likely around here
Salary: Commensurate with experience, but nearly as much as you will get flogging ciggies to kids as a Big Tobacco lobbyist, after we lose the election

Comments (6)

I wonder why?

Comments (5)

But don’t worry – Rocco Rossi has a plan to fix everything!

“A fight within Ontario Conservative party ranks flared up again this week after an e-mail revealed links between a renegade candidate and a sitting MPP.

The e-mail from Jack MacLaren, who is trying to unseat 33-year veteran MPP Norm Sterling as the Progressive Conservative candidate in Carleton-Mississppi Mills, appears to be routed through MPP Randy Hillier’s website.

Sterling has complained bitterly about links between Hillier, his caucus colleague, and MacLaren, the man trying to unseat him. He says he plans on raising the issue anew with Progressive Conservative leader Tim Hudak.

“Perhaps he will say something to Randy when he becomes aware of it,” he said.

Hudak, who embraced Hillier during the party’s 2009 leadership, even adopting the latter’s policy to abolish the Ontario Human Rights Tribunal, refused a request from the Citizen to comment on the situation. A Hudak aide also did not respond to an e-mailed request for a statement from the PC party leader.”

(By the by, that italicized bit sure is interesting. Kind of public funding for private religious schools all over again. Except worse.)

Comments (4)

Thanks for showing up, Steve.

Could have used you a bit earlier on.

Comments (16)

Provided by my brother Ted Betts, and sent to him by a Conservative who is both “senior” and “anonymous.”

UPDATE: And the Grits have put together a petition, here. I might even watch QP today!

Comments (35)

So sayeth the Star.

Personally, I still don’t think so, but what do I know?

What thinkest thou, O wk.com readers?

Comments (17)

But I’m certain Rocco Rossi will fix it all up for him!

Inside the low-rise office tower overlooking the Queensway near Blair Road, Dr. Wilbert Keon, former heart surgeon and recently retired Conservative Senator, chided Hudak for speaking in generalities.

“ I have no idea what his plan is and a general statement like doesn’t make sense to me at all,” said Keon, who started his tenure as chairman of the Champlain LHIN board of directors last week. “The big mistake in health care in Canada is there is too much centralization, too many mega-facilities and not enough attention to services at the local level.”

“I’m a card-carrying Conservative but my love for health care transcends my political persuasions,” Keon added. “I have agreed to do whatever I can to help local health networks make the necessary adjustments to streamline the system as a whole.”

Keon added that he was waiting for the Conservatives to demonstrate they have a plan for the money that would be freed up by scrapping the LHINs, which have a mandate to streamline health care at the local level.

“If (Hudak) doesn’t have a plan for producing more community services, the money will just get wasted, as it has been in the past.”

Comments (7)

As regulars at this site know, Harry S = Nola = Moira = Walter Water = Justin B = Bud = Carlos = Consistent = Observant.  There are a multiplicity of other names.  In some cases, he is now appropriating the names of other, real, people.  Which is a criminal offence.

He comes to this site to spew venom and threats, and I try and delete him as often as possible.  To avoid detection, he unplugs his modem regularly – he’s in the 65.95.13*.*** range, always – and he’s persistent.  Last time a few of us focussed on him, he pledged to stay away, claiming he was “sick.” He hasn’t.

I want to get this guy, once and for all.  He’s a menace.  Who’s in?

Comments (7)

“@kinsellawarren: Ministers are entitled to write whatever they want on papers put before them. Lying about what they wrote to the H of C? Not.”

UPDATED: A resourceful CP photog caught her behind the Commons this morning. Charming, isn’t she?

Harper loyalist Odious Oda displays her government’s commitment to smoke-cessation.  And optics.

Comments (40)

WK and the Replacements’ Tommy Stinson – taking a break from selling SFH merch – at the Bovine last year.

Twenty years later – a fabulous oral history, with the infamous SFH/Replacements night recalled:

Cam Carpenter: Toronto would be a lot sadder without the Bovine. It would be like losing a clubhouse. You wouldn’t have the chance to look across the bar and go “Who is the dude with the blonde perm? Oh, he’s in Bon Jovi.” Or you’re there to see Shit from Hell and you look up and there’s Tommy Stinson from The Replacements. You just don’t get that very much. It’s also a really good place to find Ian Blurton if you ever need him for anything.

Comments (2)